Numb3rs
Journal Entry:
Mon Nov 9, 2009, 11:18 AM
6 Months and 15 Days = How long I've been single
2 Months and 28 Days = How long since I've been actually free
1 Month and 24 Days = Until 2nd semester school starts
In my life I have never really counted the days, the months, or the years as some people do. I acknowledge birthdays, Christmas, the annual holidays, naturally, but I have never actually sat down and counted what matters.
For example: 6 Years, 10 Months and 23 Days = How long I've lived on a beautiful Island that, now, is home to my family and friends. 3 Years, 10 Months and 3 Days = Since I did something stupid, but opened tons of doors to me. 1 Year, 11 Months and 4 Days = Since I fell in love with the wrong man.
Looking at these numbers, most people would just shake their head, because they mean absolutely nothing to anyone except me. I've regretted tons in my life, but I'm not the only one who has. I will never deny that I spent a year of my life doing something stupid. By no ones fault but my own. Why do i start counting now? I ask myself that even now, and yet the answer is there and not.
Why am I counting?
Am I counting because I need the numbers to make it 'normal'? Yes
Am I doing it to make it real? Yes
To see how long it will take me to forgive myself? Most definitely.
But I think the real reason I'm counting is that I want to know that they are just numbers.
01-5-08, 01-5-07, 05-24-09, 08-13-09
Numbers, like combinations or passwords, the important ones you remember and use, but they all fall into the background, and used only when 100% necessary. But like my combination lock to my locker in 3rd grade, I won't remember every detail in 13 years, I probably will even forget names, places, faces, heck, I could forget myself even. Not that I'd like to, I'm perfecting myself each and every day, so I'm working on that.
But back to my numbers, what was your telephone number when you were 12? Do you remember what locker you had when you went to highschool that first year? That's wht I mean! We remember being twelve (12) but we remember the fun parts, the learning bits, the things that matter at 12. We remember the first friend we had in Highschool, our first crush maybe on an older student. Not the trivial things that some people harp on, and yes, I will admit to it, I harp on the little things. But definitely W.I.P.
What numbers do you wish you could let fall to the background?
What combination do you remember in your life?
We all have them, but do we want to?
- Mood:
Bemused - Listening to: Energetic - BoA
- Reading: Twlight -.-
André.
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[Emotion is life. We need more lovesongs in hardcore.]
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Human subtlety...will never devise an invention more beautiful, more simple or more direct than does nature, because in her inventions nothing is lacking, and nothing is superfluous
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Human subtlety...will never devise an invention more beautiful, more simple or more direct than does nature, because in her inventions nothing is lacking, and nothing is superfluous
--
Human subtlety...will never devise an invention more beautiful, more simple or more direct than does nature, because in her inventions nothing is lacking, and nothing is superfluous
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